Ways I Am Simplifying My Life

Living with more intention in 2024

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Dear Inklings,

December can be wonderful or difficult, depending on your experience with the holidays. Sometimes it is both. As 2023 comes to a close, many of us are reflecting on the past year and wondering what the next will bring.

Do you feel like you are already way behind before the new year has even started?

That’s where I am.

This year has been eventful and pivotal in so many ways:

• I gave birth to my daughter after years of infertility and a horrendous pregnancy.

• We moved into our forever home; oh, do I have dreams for this space.

• I quit social media, a spontaneous decision I have not regretted.

• I started a Substack with no plan and almost no subscribers and now I’m almost at a hundred, 10% of whom are paying members. I can’t believe it either.

• I started a part-time job after a decade of being out of the work force. Only being able to work a meaningful job I adore could have impelled me to be away from my children, and I’m happy to say I found that.

Though I’m a workaholic, juggling so many balls while living with chronic illness has meant learning to quiet my perfectionism and be okay with letting some things go.

The house will not always be in order (in fact, it now rarely is). Not everything will get done. I need more help with simple tasks and cannot do everything myself anymore. Ugh the workaholic, perfectionist, independent streaks in me are all wailing in protest.

Simultaneously, I’m mentally in a better place than I have been for years (in part, thanks to intensive therapy and treatment over the past four years). I’m more in tune with my needs and boundaries, and have grown in my sense of self-worth. It helps to not be so actively in crisis anymore (though I say that tentatively because my catastrophic thinking is still waiting for another devastating thing just around the corner).

In the aftermath, I’m still working through the experiences I and my family have clawed (are still clawing) our way out of. We will process all of it eventually, but not right now.

In many ways, my world has grown narrower in the past few years, but has also broadened in that I’m focusing more and more on what is most essential to me.

All that to say, I have a few habits and lifestyle choices I aim to implement in the coming year:

I am quitting Amazon,

indeed, have already cancelled our prime membership. I hope to move away from obsessive consumerist culture. Amazon is convenient. It’s quick. It’s easy. But it’s not good for me. Maybe some things will be harder to find without it, but it’s a trade-off I’m willing to make.

This includes other companies owned by Amazon, most notably for me as a reader, Goodreads.

Unfortunately, as an indie author, full departure from Amazon may not be possible until I find better alternatives. One idea I’ve been flirting with is publishing books here on my Substack. Or maybe Bookshop.org will start publishing ebooks, please? We shall see.

No more social media.

With my not-so-fond farewell to Instagram and Facebook, I’m able to focus so much better on just writing. Much less time is wasted in the addictive scrolling. I thought I would miss it more, but I don’t, even a tiny bit.

The only caveat is that because I deactivated and deleted everything so abruptly, I left everyone without a way to contact or read my writing if they wished to. As such, I am planning out a brief return, a last hurrah, a final farewell, to let people know where I can still be found.

I turn off all but essential notifications.

I’ve already done this for a while now. Even notifications I do have turned on are silent except for Michael’s. I hate being a slave to my phone, so this practice has been hugely beneficial for my sanity. It could always do with some more culling though, so I reevaluate which apps deserve to send me notifications periodically.

I’m going to be okay with unsubscribing.

I want to be less consumeristic and more mindful of how and where I am consuming when I do. I’m tired of the constant barrage of, “BUY THIS AND YOU WILL BE HAPPY,” everywhere I look. Instagram is like that. I don’t need my inbox to be like that. To me, it’s a sacred little mailbox where I’d prefer to only receive letters I value.

Likewise, I strive to be unafraid of unsubscribing to newsletters, partly inspired by this post by

Chris Wheeler

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And on that note, I want to read widely and deeply.

For the newsletters I do subscribe to, I want to give myself the proper time and space to digest them. I don’t want to skim a bunch of letters only to forget about them the next instant. This will help me interact more meaningfully and thoughtfully.

The same principle applies to my reading life. I’m not ruling out “fast food” books (sometimes it is nice to read a book purely for entertainment), but I tend to be more drawn to books that make me think and feel deeply. I may read less books overall, but I will gain more out of the books I do read.

I’m diligently using my Monk Manual.

I mentioned this in my November Digest, but it’s such a game-changer I have to bring it up again. Monk Manual has helped me so much to pinpoint my priorities and actually act on them.

As we know, the most important things are usually not the most urgent. Living with more intentionality may be a buzzword nowadays, but that doesn’t mean it’s wrong. I love this journal for how it focuses my attention on what makes my life worth living. It helps me take a realistic look at the time I have and how I can best make use of it so I don’t get so caught up in the little things.

For the first time, I’m tentatively, quietly hopeful for the next year.

What’s one small thing you can do to live with more intentionality next year? Respond to this email or share with me in the comments.

With Love,

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A very warm welcome to our newest Inklings,

Jacob Kolasch

,

Teron Wolf

, Hung-Peng L., and Shuyuan! I’m so happy you’re here. And huge thank you to Kat for becoming a paid subscriber. Your support means so much to me.