Hello and welcome to The Untangling, a haven for you to untangle identity, trauma, and broken narratives.
This is where we question beliefs—cultural, social, religious, familial—and why we believe them.
Fundamentalist Christianity, traditional East Asian values, mental and chronic illness, and experiencing all kinds of trauma shaped who I grew up to be.
I have spent over the last decade untangling who I was told to be from who I truly am. Perhaps you are searching for freedom, too.
You will not find single-dimensional viewpoints here. If that’s what you are looking for, this is not the publication for you. I am not one thing, and often anger everyone by questioning both/all sides.
However, you are very welcome here, even if we disagree!!
I am making space for us to question, discuss, unwind, and rewind those tangled parts of our souls, together.
This is for you.
“Have you eaten?”
As my 97-year-old grandmother enters hospice, I reflect on a lifetime of love expressed through food—the true Asian love language.
This is the fourth year since your son died
An exploration of parental grief four years after loss, where unexpected moments still shatter the fragile normalcy of moving forward.
Letters to the Forgotten Ones I Still Love
A raw essay chronicling five devastating losses: 4 miscarriages and the death of an adopted son - exploring grief, love, and the weight of remembering those who existed briefly
Tracing Your Shadow through Shifting Leaves
Chronicling my father's recurring cancer battles in 7 powerful drabbles. Follow my emotional journey from childhood to adulthood as I grapple with love and uncertainty.
What They Don't Tell You About the Third Year After Losing Someone
A poignant, deeply personal essay exploring the complex emotions and profound loneliness that come with prolonged grief, three years after a loss of a child.
In the Absence of a Lost Love, Will an Echo Do?
Can AI help us cope with grief by simulating lost loved ones? A poignant exploration of love, loss, and the limitations of technology in the face of sorrow.
Christmas For Those Who Grieve
A compassionate letter for those grieving during Christmas. Finding ways to honor lost loved ones while navigating holiday grief and sorrow.
Advent, Fog, and Beauty in the Unknown
A poetic reflection on grief, hope, and unexpected miracles through the lens of chasing fog in Colorado mountains. A story of loss, pregnancy, and finding beauty in uncertainty.
Making a Home for Grief
A mother's raw journey through child loss reveals why grief doesn't heal—it evolves. Learn how accepting grief's permanence becomes the path forward.